Make a list
Make a list of all the reasons it wasn’t meant to be. The number one reason should be that this person is not in love with only you. You deserve better than to be someone’s back-up between flings, and/or ego trip.
Find out Incompatibility
Especially when you imagine yourself spending the rest of your life with this person and remember the ways in which you clash on a regular basis. Human memory can be selective, and you may find yourself dwelling on that first kiss in the park, or that time when you laughed till you almost cried… but also remember the times when you felt neglected, unappreciated, betrayed, or even deeply hurt
Find out the Faults
See their faults. Nobody is perfect. The longer you hold on to the idea that this person is perfect, the harder it’ll be to get on with your life.
Accept He/she is Not Perfect
You should accept that this person is not perfect, and definitely not perfect for you — because the perfect person for you would think as highly of you as you do of them.
List down what you have experienced
Think of what you want from a significant other that you didn’t get from this person. Was he or she arrogant? Selfish? Insincere? Write down the opposites of those traits (humble, giving, and honest). This would help you to get out from it easily.
Learn from your mistakes
Find out the faults, list them and find out the opposite of those things. This will help you in the long run.
Ask yourself was it a TRUE Love?
Ask yourself if it was really true love you were feeling for this person. If you recognize that it was infatuation or lust rather than love, then you will have an easier time letting go.
Remove as many traces of their presence in your life as you can. This is very, very difficult but also very important. Ask friends and family to help you sort through things and put anything that reminds you of him or her in a box.
Return all of the traces
You should return all of the traces if you want to keep yourself away from him/her, mail them–don’t give it to them in person and torture yourself.
Burn all the Traces or Gifts
Always burn the gifts which have been given to you by your partner.
Redecoration of your home
If you lived together, consider redecorating. Even moving furniture around can help dilute those feelings that will inevitably surge when you wake up without them next to you. If it’s possible and necessary, you might even consider moving.
Go Away Silently
Distance yourself. You won’t want to, but staying close to someone you want but can’t have just isn’t healthy. Don’t tell the person or anyone close to them what you are doing, as they might try to convince you otherwise.
Make it out of sight out of mind
Just try to get away for a while. Don’t call them, don’t go places where you know they are frequent, and make yourself scarce. If you must have some contact (such as work) respond to messages slowly after a few days.
Don’t assume after distancing yourself for a while from that person that you are over it. Be careful to make sure you are fully over this person before you see the person again.
If it was an unhealthy influence
If your partner was an unhealthy influence in your life (controlling, manipulative, abusive, etc.), cut them out completely. There’s no obligation to stay on good terms with someone who made your life miserable, even if they didn’t mean to.
Thought Stopping System
Practice thought stopping, a technique that helps you to become more mindful and in control of what you think (or don’t want to think about, as the case may be.)
Use STOP Sign
Visualizing an image such as a stop sign may also help. Then, choose something else to think about that is pleasant.
Think of Your Wishes
Do all the things you’ve ever wanted to do, that you wouldn’t have done if you were still with that person?
Focus on Missed Opportunities
Did you want to go to that car? Fashion? Or antique lamp show with your friends, but felt reluctant to spend your day off with someone other than your love? Did you want to travel to an exotic country, but your partner didn’t want to go because it’s too hot/dirty/boring? Now it’s time to fulfill those miss opportunities.
Make a list of why you should not be ‘lovers’
Is your friend in another relationship? Do you want the same things out of life / a partner / the future? Realizing you may be very much alike but that you look for very different things in a partner may really help you move on, think carefully if this is your case.
Avoid Contact with That Person
The best way to fall out of love is to avoid contact with that person. Just let things play out. This is not easy, you may experience pain, but everything happens for a reason. The key is to be patient.
Make TWO Columns
Entitle the left column Positives and the right column Negatives. In the left column write down all the Positive things about the person you love. The list may be short – especially if he/she hasn’t been treating well lately. Be as honest with yourself as possible.
Evaluate the Negative Things
Write down all the Negative things about this person. List actual situations/events where you noticed ambivalent or non-caring behavior on their part. It may hurt to write these things down, but it’s important you remember them.
Possible Reasons Are
Is your relationship with your lover losing its charm each passing day? Are you feeling unnecessarily guilty about the way your love relationship has been hitting a downward slope? Is your lover constantly criticizing you badly for all trivial or even significant things? You have come to know that your partner is two-timing you? Yes, if this is your case you can go out from the love
Judge the Feelings
If you have a sinking feeling that there is nothing left to your love life, there can be nothing better than to get over your love and move ahead.
Understand and Accept the Fact
You have to understand and accept the fact that you deserve a lover who not only loves you, but also respects you. Occasional bickering is okay in any relationship. If you understand that its missing then you should leave him/her at once
It’s a danger signal if your current lover is unnecessarily restricting you all the time or imposing unfair rules. For example asking you to wear only a certain kind of clothes, not permitting interaction with people you like, etc.
See/Face the Reality
The longer you hold on to the idea that this person is perfect, the harder it’ll be to get on with your life. It’s completely possible that you’re idealizing someone just so that you can have a fantasy to hold on to. So see the reality.
Motivate and Do Things Accordingly
Do all those things you know will make you feel good about yourself? This could be something like taking up a new hobby, attending parties, fine dining, etc. Life is short, remember? So do not waste it yearning for somebody who does not care two hoots about you. You deserve better.
Getting Rid of Reminders
Discard or pack away any and all reminders — this includes cards, letters, stuffed animals, pictures, text messages, voicemail messages, emails and any other sentimental items that take your thoughts straight to him/her.
Cutting off Communication
Don’t call or answer the calls. Delete his/her texts immediately. Avoid places where you know he/she tends to go. Even though it may be hard, take a break from mutual friends.
Lean on your friends and family, but also allow yourself some alone time to grieve; falling out of love is a loss. Confide in one or two of your closest friends who will just listen.
Take Advantage of Positive Time
Take advantage of some positive time to yourself. When you’re trying to get over someone, which is typically the most hurtful time, it’s OK to be angry. Write in a journal or even write letters to him/her, detailing how hurt you are and how you feel about him/her, then tear the letters up.
It’s All About You
Pamper yourself. Curl up with a good book or go see a comedy with a couple of friends. Take a mini-vacation or spend a day at the spa or gym. Do something for yourself that you enjoy but have neglected.
Time is the Fact
Above anything else you can do, realize that it will take time to completely fall out of love and heal your broken heart. Keep in mind that, in a sense, you may never fall completely out of love, meaning that a small part of you may always care for him/her.
Tame Your Thoughts
It’s better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all. So, you can’t let someone who loved you bring you down. Just stop thinking about him/her. Bury all those thoughts about life together, picturesque future and idyllic homes.
Friends Are Forever
With the demise of your relationship, you are given an opportunity to make new ties. Often, when you are romantically involved with someone, you lose out on a plenty of precious friends. But, friends will always be a call away. Meet up with your old friends and know how to make new friends. Socialize as much as possible, for that’s the only way to know how to fall out of love with your partner
Pick your favorite and anchor yourself, in a system of beliefs that will guide you in your tumultuous times. It may sound a little clichéd, but if you want to know how to fall out of love with someone, then the old path of salvation, sure is the way.
Control your thoughts
Don’t let him/her bring you down. Don’t think about him/her.
Excise the silly, cut the negativity
Get religion, get spirituality. Find your center, your deity, your peace, your core, your pit, whatever you want to call it. If that means a church, blessed be.
Questions to Ask Yourselves
Are the two of you growing as individuals? Where are the two of you heading? Is the relationship becoming stale? Is there something that you are looking for that your partner simply does not provide? If the answer is yes to any of these questions then perhaps it’s time to rethink your relationship. Cause you might be on that stage of couples falling out of love.
How to treat yourself
Find the time to improve yourself, indulge in charity, set better and higher goals for yourself, and take up spirituality to find that balance that you may feel is lacking.
What should be the ideal condition?
Staying in love with your partner is not something that just happens. You have to make it fresh each day. If you really cannot make it work, then ending the relationship is likely the best thing you can do.
Salvage it and don’t blame it
If you are lucky enough to recognize that your relationship is rocky, you may be able to salvage it. Never lay the blame on your partner. It takes two to tango. Accept your part in the demise of love, and maybe together you can recapture the feelings that drew you to each other.
Over time our needs change and the love we have for another tends to mature. Love grows up just like we do. Sometimes a person will go from being in love with a person to loving them.
Biological Side Effects
This happens because of the biological side effects taking place in the body. The pure intensity of lust fools many to believe that they are falling, when they aren’t. They are actually aroused. Lust is temporary and love is forever.
The biggest mistake most people make when they break up with their partner is to believe that they somehow have to instantly, magically fall out of love with their ex. That simply is just not so. Even after you fall out of love you are still attached with your partner
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